dear the better me

dear the better me,

i was talking with a friend today, bless his heart! but he allowed me to kinda word vomit everything i was feeling.

its as if i feel so lost. but i don't think that is it at all. i've been listening to a lot talks, reading quotes, stories, and magazines, and talking to friends. and what i've come to, is that i missing a huge part of my life --- service, giving back.

i read quote about, the things that make you live longer. number one thing on the list, friends. there was a clarification, that it wasn't what the friends did for you that made you live longer, but what YOU did for your friends.

and then, i was listening to my favorite conversations on the mormon channel, and barbara thompson was featured. she said, that as a single woman, life was ok because she learned and realized that by giving back, giving service, is what makes being single so ok.

which all leads me to thinking about what the better me is. i think that my uneasyniess (and unfortunately i am afraid it comes of as a lack of confidence or direction in life) stems from the fact that i really have desire to make a difference in people lives.

that i what can make me a better me. i talk to people at walmart, or at the DMV, with the hope that i can make one little difference. but is that enough? how can i give more?

and so -- that is my dilemma, and my challenge to find the better me. that's all i want -- and really all i want people to remember me as -- the one who made a difference! i hope to figure it out soon.

love,
ta